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19 May 2010

I Have No Idea What Happiness Means

What actually happiness means?
My life just alright. It's perfect for me, at least perfect in my way.
I had a good family who loves me and friends.
I don't have what I want, but I have what I need.

But somehow, I feel there's something wrong.
There's something I should have, but I don't.
Could it be a affection? Or succesful? Charisma?
I know "pride and competition cannot filled the empty arms" just like Don Henley said.
But I wish that isn't love, that emotion.
Cause I don't have any but myself.

I laughed, but I don't feel glad.
I smiled, but it's seems like my automatic mode who's smiled, not my own self.
I hate if somebody caught me cry,
and I think there's no use to let people knows my feelings.

If they do, then what?
Could they change it? No. Things happened and time always run.
I even can't make myself laugh,
so I decided to make everybody's laughed.

Really, I totally have no idea what happiness means.

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