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20 December 2011

This happens when you live in hell

I hate my family. Not because I want to, but they give me too much reason and that makes me do. I honestly have no idea whom I live with. Everybody's changing, even my little brother sometimes seems like join their side against me. I know I'm living a hell, but this week is the hardest part of the month, I guess.
My aunt mad at me because I'm coming home late on two last Sunday, working on my group task that not  easy to make. She gave me silent treatment and judge me like I'm a bad girl or something. Nobody at home talks to me for like 5 days. Last Friday we went to groceries and I thought it's getting better, but suddenly she gave me another silent treatment the very next day for reason I don't even know! I always come home late cause my school is far, it's like 2 hours distance and Jakarta's traffic is crazy as hell. There's no food when I come home, and I'm so hungry but my daily pocket money can't buy me food. I had to pay the transport and because of the distance, it's pretty expensive. Couple days ago I'm so starving but I can't eat instants anymore cause I've been ate it for like forever as that's the only food in house. I drank some mineral water, wish it could helps.
But when I come down to living room for another glass of water, I saw they just finished their dinner. Without me. Without telling me, or buy me some, or even leaving me some. That's sad and crazy. They judges me, they ruin my life, they ruin my dream, they let me down and now they don't even gave me food?
Today I woke up late and she already gone. No pocket money for today. I got a presentation today and now I wonder how to pay the transport.
It's a sad, pathetic life I got. And if there's no Red who missing me from where he are, I might grab a knife and better kill myself now.

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