A Small Priceless Thing

Beberapa hari yang lalu gue naik metromini dari Blok M ke kampus, duduk di bangku kedua setelah pintu masuk depan. Nggak lama setelah gue duduk dan metromini jalan, seorang wanita paruh baya, dengan semburat warna putih dan kelabu di rambutnya, memakai baju oranye seragam Dinas Kebersihan Jakarta, duduk di depan gue.Kurus, dari belakang dia kelihatan capek.
Nggak yang spesial. Sampai seorang pengamen naik, main gitar dan nyanyi. Muka pengamen itu, somehow, terkesan baik di mata gue. Dan lagunya pun lumayan, nggak asal genjreng nyanyi aja. Gue merogoh kantung tas, menyiapkan sekeping uang lima ratus perak untuk dikasih sebelum gue turun dari metromini.
Di depan kampus, gue berdiri dan bersiap-siap turun. Bertepatan dengan lagu yang selesai dinyanyikan pengamen itu, gue bersiap untuk turun sekaligus memasukan koin itu ke dalam kantung bekas makanan ringan yang usang, yang jadi tempat penadah periuk nasi orang itu sehari-hari.
Tapi sebelum gue sempat memberikan uang, lima ratus perak yang nyaris nggak ada artinya, ibu di depan gue mengeluarkan sekeping logam seribu rupiah dari kantung seragam jumpsuit-nya.
Gue ngerasa sangat malu. Karena terlalu pelit, mungkin juga karena begitu kagum sama Ibu itu. Mengingatkan gue sama kisah di Alkitab tentang seorang janda miskin yang memberikan semua harta yang dimilikinya untuk Tuhan di Bait Allah. Beberapa keping uang logam yang jauh lebih berarti ketimbang duit-duit yang disumbangkan orang kaya untuk sesamanya.
Dan entah kenapa, gue merasa sangat terhormat dan beruntung bisa bertemu sosok sederhana seperti itu.

World We Live In

Vienna Court Opera, Vienna, Austria, 1902.

Stoic Japanese orphan, standing at attention having brought his dead younger brother to a cremation pyre, Nagasaki, by Joe O’Donnell 1945.

This photograph was taken by an American photojournalist, Joe O’Donnell, in Nagasaki in 1945.

He recently spoke to a Japanese interviewer about this picture:

“I saw a boy about ten years old walking by. He was carrying a baby on his back. In those days in Japan, we often saw children playing with their little brothers or sisters on their backs, but this boy was clearly different. I could see that he had come to this place for a serious reason. He was wearing no shoes. His face was hard. The little head was tipped back as if the baby were fast asleep.

“The boy stood there for five or ten minutes. The men in white masks walked over to him and quietly began to take off the rope that was holding the baby. That is when I saw that the baby was already dead. The men held the body by the hands and feet and placed it on the fire.

“The boy stood there straight without moving, watching the flames. He was biting his lower lip so hard that it shone with blood. The flame burned low like the sun going down. The boy turned around and walked silently away.”

Quaint second hand book store in Versailles.

Officer's ID Card.

Suicide Warning Signs

Vogue Korea, December 2011, Song Hye Kyo by Oh Joong Seok.

Michelle Williams by Chris Heath for GQ, February 2012

There is a question I have been wanting to understand the answer to, but have been feeling that I simply can’t ask. Eventually I just ask it anyway:

Do you think there was a part of you that imagined the two of you would somehow end up together?

Immediately, I wish that I hadn’t. The look on her face—a kind of juddering visceral alarm at what has been said…I don’t wish to see that look many more times in my life. “That would make me way too sad to answer,” she says quickly, and I hurriedly begin another question, about something completely different, hoping that if I say it fast enough these new words will chase the old words away from where they are hanging in the air between us, and maybe she will let me pretend that it was something I never said.

“No, no,” she says, and I can see the tears forming, and I think she means that she doesn’t want to answer any more questions about anything. I mutter some kind of apology under my breath.

But, even now, I’m wrong about everything. Mostly she is just trying to stop my new question. She has something to tell me.

“No,” she says. “I said it would make me too sad to answer but it’s also…”—and she nods even as her voice breaks once more with tears—”…one of my favorite things to imagine.” And through the tears, a beaming, almost beatific smile stretches room-wide across her face. “It’s actually one of my favorite places to visit.”

LZ Lambeau event in Green Bay to honor the Vietnam vets that were never properly welcomed home after thier tours of duty.

This was one Gold Star mother being helped by another Gold Star mother as she found her son’s name on the wall. I know its not the same as him coming home, but it takes my breath away when I think of the amazing dignity and grace this woman showed when they interviewed her. She even took her place on one of the motorcycles for the honor ride where over 1200 men and women rode to signify the number of wisconsin soldiers that never made it home.

The scene, part of the “Walk a Mile in her Shoes” event, was a sight to behold. Soldiers and civilians, mostly male, strapped on flashy red high heels and pushed strollers or carried their children in backpacks. Battle buddies teetered clumsily, holding onto each other for physical and even moral support.

Little sweet elephant.

A soldier in Iraq watch his baby born via webcam.

A tiger mother lost her cubs from premature labour. Shortly after she became depressed and her health declined, and she was diagnosed with depression. So they wrapped up piglets in tiger cloth, and gave them to the tiger. The tiger now loves these pigs and treats them like her babies.

Coco Chanel.

This is how our story gonna end... and how our life gonna start!

 This is my present to him as 5 monthversarry. It's been a year... and that was my last time in Bandung. It's such a beautiful days I've spent there and now I miss him a lot. His semester holiday is over and tomorrow he'll back to busy activities etc. I hope he's not too busy so we could talk a little bit more.

Or maybe, well, I wish I were there.

It's the cover.

Pada suatu hari di tempat yang jauh, sebuah kerajaan berdiri di atas bukit kecil.Kerajaan itu bernama Bugya.

Kerajaan Bugya dipimpin oleh Putri Gendut yang hobi membaca buku. Ia memiliki banyak sekali koleksi buku di dalamnya.

Di Kerajaan Bugya ada sebuah kedai surabi yang terkenal. Banyak orang datang untuk makan setiap harinya. 

Kabar tentang kedai surabi itu telah menyebar luas sampai ke telinga Pangeran Kambing yang tinggal di Kerajaan Merah Kuning Hijau. Karena rasa ingin tahunya yang besar, Pangeran Kambing pun menunggangi kudanya dan pergi berkunjung ke Kerajaan Bugya.

Dan ternyata benar apa kata kabar itu. Sesampainya disana, kedai surabi itu penuh sekali dengan orang-orang yang ingin makan disana. Saking penuhnya tempat itu sampai-sampai ia harus berbagi meja dengan orang lain. Disanalah ia bertemu Putri Gendut. “Ada siluman kambing,” batin Putri Gendut saat melihat Pangeran Kambing. “Ada manusia bola,” pikir Pangeran Kambing saat melihat Putri Gendut.

Mereka pun memperkenalkan diri masing-masing dan mengobrol tentang banyak hal. Pangeran Kambing suka sekali tidur, baik di kamar sampai di tengah jalan. Ia pun suka bermain futsal dengan menggunakan tanduknya sambil memakan rumput lapangan bersama Paman Bob yang dikaguminya. Sementara Putri Gendut suka membaca buku dan menggambar sendirian di ruangannya sampai berjam-jam. Ia juga suka mendengarkan lagu lama. Pangeran Kambing bercerita tentang Paman Bob yang jago menyanyi dan membuat Putri Gendut ingin berkunjung ke Kerajaan Merah Kuning Hijau suatu saat.

Pangeran Kambing menceritakan banyak kisah dan membuat Putri Gendut penasaran akan dunia di luar kerajaannya karena selama ini ia dijaga ketat dan sudah harus pulang jam enam sore. Pangeran Kambing ternyata sangat lucu seperti badut sehingga semua perkataannya dapat membuat Putri Gendut tertawa terbahak-bahak.

Putri Gendut bercerita ia memiliki sebuah gambar. Ia telah menghabiskan berhari-hari untuk membuat gambar itu tapi ia tidak tahu harus mewarnainya dengan warna apa. Pangeran Kambing mengajukan diri untuk membantu Putri Gendut mewarnai gambar itu karena di Kerajaan Merah Kuning Hijau, semua gambar harus memiliki warna. Putri Gendut setuju dan mengundang Pangeran Kambing untuk ke datang istananya.

Namun alangkah terkejutnya saat Putri Gendut melihat hasil karya Pangeran Kambing. Gambar itu berwarna merah, kuning dan hijau! Itu semua karena Pangeran Kambing berasal dari Kerajaan Merah Kuning Hijau sehingga semua benda di kerajaan itu berwarna merah, kuning dan hijau.

Saking terkejutnya Putri Gendut sampai tidak bisa berkata apa-apa. Ia pun menjadi vertigo dan pingsan. Pangeran Kambing kebingungan. Ia memutuskan untuk berlari dan memanggil dayang-dayang dan meminta obat untuk Putri Gendut.

Tapi Pangeran Kambing berlari terlalu cepat dan ia jatuh terpeleset. Melihat Pangeran Kambing jatuh, Putri Gendut langsung siuman dan ia menjadi sangat panik.

Putri Gendut langsung mengambil P3K dan mengobati Pangeran Kambing. Ia sangat sedih karena Pangeran Kambing terluka sehingga ia menangis tersedu-sedu. Melihat kepanikan Putri Gendut yang menangis sambil membalut kakinya, entah mengapa membuat Pangeran Kambing merasa senang karena perhatian dari Putri Gendut.

Putri Gendut merawat Pangeran Kambing sampai sembuh dengan penuh kasih sayang. Lalu saat Pangeran Kambing sembuh, ia pergi ke toko permen dan membelikan Putri Gendut sebatang lollipop untuk menunjukkan rasa sayangnya pada Putri Gendut. Ia tidak pergi ke toko bunga karena di kerajaannya, bunga adalah lauk yang dimakan bersama rumput dan itu adalah makanan kesukaannya.

Mendengar ucapan Pangeran Kambing membuat Putri Gendut sangat senang. Sudah setahun penuh Putri Gendut merasa sedih dan kesepian karena banyak hal dan kini Pangeran Kambing datang dan membawa banyak kebahagiaan yang tidak pernah ia rasakan sebelumnya.

Akhirnya Pangeran Kambing membawa Putri Gendut ke Kerajaan Merah Kuning Hijau dan membuat hidup Putri Gendut lebih berwarna dan bahagia. Dan mereka pun hidup bahagia bersama untuk selama-lamanya.

It's the back cover.

Once Upon a Time...

Once upon a time there was one naive girl from big old city moved to a smaller city. As she pursued her dream, she met someone. They were fall in love and live a happy simple ordinary life together. That was the happiest moment she ever felt in her entire life, where everything just perfect even she knew it doesn't.

Once upon a time there was a crazy old bitch from a small city. She was happy, but that's a very long time ago. Somehow she ruined happy people's life. So she does what she do. She ruined someone's happiness. Break it, rip it into little pieces.

Once upon a time there was one naive girl who felt a happiness for the first time. But then someone took it and ruined her life, innocent just faded away. She doesn't believe in anyone, as the more people knew her, the more she treat people kind, those people just so selfish and take her for granted. So she stopped being naive. Just one nice girl, with a thousand curse on her mind everyday. She hurts, and pain makes her cynical like she do now.

Once upon a time there was a dream. A simple little dream and that's not so much. Just a wish to be happy. No need to be rich or famous, being pretty and genius. Just a happy life with somebody to love. And just like fairy tales, dream comes true. And that was perfect. Anyhow, nothing lasts forever. So dream does. It's only happened for a while.

Once upon a time there was one cynical girl, living in the old big city. She's been in countryside for a while, but that's a memory she'll never forget. Cause the happiest moment of her life was happened there. Love in the air, passion on work, beautiful friendship, a pretty city, a simple lovely life. Happiness had gone, but not forever, cause nothing last forever, and pain should include. So this pain won't stay too long. She'll find another way to feel the happiness again. And if the time comes, she believe the happiness would stay for a lifetime. Not forever, just a pretty happiness for a lifetime.

Once upon a time there was a brand new dream. It made from tears, disappointment and shattered dream.  The dreamer was down when the last comes for a while and leave her breathless. Days, weeks, months passing by. And that was the tough, but somehow she made it through. And she had a faith that someday, this brand new dream will come true just like the old one... and stay no matter what may happen. No one can break, it'll coming true and that will be the real happiness.

Katie Kirkpatrick's Story: The Cancer Bride

Katie Kirkpatrick, 21, held off cancer to celebrate the happiest day of her life. Katie had chased cancer, once only to have it return-to clog her lungs and grab hold of her heart. Breathing was difficult now, she had to use oxygen. The pain in her back was so intense it broke through the morphine that was supposed to act as a shield. Her organs were shutting down but it would not stop her from marrying Nick Godwin, 23, who was in love with Katie since 11th grade.

Katie Kirkpatrick, 21, holds some of her daily medication for several minutes before taking them as she waves in and out of sleep because of the morphine she takes while sitting in the livingroom of the familly home in Metamora on January 11, 2005. Katie has cancer of the lungs.

Katie is in a lot of pain in the days leading to her wedding taking morphine and numerous medications to help her. Niki Kirkpatrick,right, took a leave of abscence from work so she can take care of her daugther Katie who now needs constant assistance.

Nick Godwin, 23, left, takes a moment of rest while his bride Katie Kirkpatrick, right, gets an intravenous procedure to reduce the amount of fluids her body is retaining at McLaren Regional Medical Center in Flint on January 12, 2005. Nick Godwin who works night shift as a Lapeer County Sheriff's deputy took Katie to the medical center after a night's work, three days before their wedding.

Katie Kirkpatrick walks past a photograph of herself when she was homecoming queen at Lapeer East High School where she also was a co-valedictorian. the photograph sits on a table in her familly's home livingroom in Metamora on January 11, 2005.

Katie Kirkpatrick, 21, puts on some hearings a few minutes before walking down the aisle to marry Nick Godwin, 23, who she had known since 11th grade, at Church of Christ in Hazel Park on Saturday January 15, 2005.

Katie Kirkpatrick, 21, and Nick Godwin, 23, cuddle up for a moment while waiting for the wedding photographer to get ready after getting married at Church of Christ in Hazel Park on Saturday January 15, 2005.

Katie Kirkpatrick, 21, and Nick Godwin, 23, a Lapeer County Sheriff's deputy whom she first met when he was in 11th grade, get married at Church of Christ in Hazel Park on Saturday January 15, 2005.

Dave Kirkpatrick gives the thumbs up to his new son in law while admiring the couple with his wife Niki Kirkpatrick, right, after Nick and Katie got married at Church of Christ in Hazel Park on Saturday January 15, 2005.

Katie Kirkpatrick Godwin, right, gets serenaded by her new husband Nick Godwin, and his best men during the wedding party on the dance floor at Boulder Point Golf Club and Banquet Center in Oxford, MI, on Saturday January 15, 2005.

Katie Kirkpatrick Godwin, center, rests for a few moments during her wedding party at Boulder Point Golf Club and Banquet Center in Oxford, MI, on Saturday January 15, 2005. Katie was exhausted. Her face looked as white as her gown.

Five days later, Katie died. She did not let sickness stop her from living, take away the hope or faith that made her believe she had a future. She had a lovely wedding and she had love and she gave love and love doesn' t die. And that is how Katie beat cancer.