Cute Bento

Cute bento. I guess it just too cute to be eaten later.

Anyway I'm going to hospitality, tourism & travel college by Monday. Maybe I could meet someone from Kitchen class to make it for me LOL.

Paris van Java Part.2

Alright.

It's been.. a day and couple hours since I heard that overjoyed news that I've been accepted in travel & tourism academy in Bandung. My head keep saying, 'I'm gonna be a good, success event organizer'. I can guess what the sketch of my future is.

But the next question is popping in my mind: "Am I selfish?"

Am I selfish? To my family, I mean. My dad, my brother, my aunt and everybody who loves me. It feels like I'm going to a far, strange places (even it only takes 3 hours from Jakarta to Bandung). I have to leave my home then.

It's been my ideal life of college since I was in first year in senior high, to leaving my hometown and move to study. I think it wouldn't be so hard cause I believe that I'm different with others. I'm so cocky and thinks that I'm mature enough to take care of my self, I can do it and I can do that with or without anyone's help.

Well maybe that's right. I can cook well (for my tongue, absolutely). I can do laundry and dishes by myself. I have a vision in life about what I want to do and what I won't, about what I'll do and what I'll never. Simply, I know what's good and bad. I don't care what people might think cause it doesn't matter for me even though there's a time when I actually care about people's opinion but that's not something that could make a big impact for me.

But if you can be independent to yourself, it doesn't mean that you could live without others. Without family, friends, all the madness and affection in your relationship. Literally I think I can live alone, when I grow up later. But I wont. It's a nightmare to live alone cause two is always better than one in any matter except trouble and bad luck. It's better to have two pencils when you have some exam, cause probably your first pencil broke so you could use the second. It's much better to have someone to share a journey with you than going by yourself without accompany. Two is always better than one in positive thinking.

My bro has changed since he heard the news. He so sensitive lately but then he could treat me like a queen few hours later. Pretty crazy. My dad asked me in a jokes, "Oh! How could you go and left me here? What I'm supposed to to then?". But that's sounds ironic for me. I'm daddy's little girl. I always being nuts without my daddy more than 36 hours. How am I supposed to live, dad?! And my lovely auntie. I'm so depend on her in many thing, physically. My life is about my family even I never share my burden to them. I never share it to anyone except myself, my diary and my blog.

In 3 weeks or earlier, I gotta pack my things up. And all the confidence that I own before seems to gone. Rezky will left in July 30 and Niya already in Malang. August gonna be a tough month without precious things in my life that I had before. My family, my besties, my classmates, all the warmth, affection, jokes, madness and laugh that always I get in Jakarta can't I keep in Bandung. It's sad tough. TT . TT

P.s.

I'm just thinking. Have you watch Princess and The Frog? That Disney's movie?

There's a song in there, sang by the cruel magician. It's said:

you get what you want, but lose what you had before

. . .

could it happen to me???

NO WAY!!!

Edith Piaf

Just yesterday, I have no idea who Edith Piaf was, except that she's a French singer. But my curiosity is in their limit so I googling it. Actually i was interesting with Marion Cotillard. She's so gorgeous and her dresses every time in the red carpet! Gee. She's stunning. Anyway, she won Oscar for her role in La Vie En Rose, which is the true story of great French singer, Edith Piaf.

Ever since I listen Hymne L'amour by Josh Groban, I always can't help myself to replay it over and over again. And guess what? The real singer or my favorite song is her! But there's a story behind the song. A sad story.

So there was a guy named Marcel Cerdan, he was a famous boxer in France and married-guy with three children. However, he had affair with her and Wikipedia said that he's the love of her life. But tragically he was died in a plane crash from France to NY to meet her. And this song is dedicated for him. That's too bad. I wonder why stunning, strong French woman have the end of her love story like this. In the movie, Boy Capel had passed away by car accident when he went to see Coco Chanel. Or that's just dramatically scene? I have no clue.

But I just fall in love with her voices and her songs. I'll download her song, I must!

Anyway, here the English translation of Hymne L'amour that I found:

The blue sky can collapse in on itself

And the earth can cave in

Little matters to me if you love me

I couldn't care less about the whole world

As long as love will flood my mornings

As long as my body will quiver beneath your hands

The problems matter so little to me

My love, because you love me

I would go to the ends of the earth

I would dye my hair blonde

If you asked me to

I would pull down the moon

I would steal fortune

If you asked me to

I would disavow my homeland

I would disavow my friends

If you asked me to

One could well laugh at me

I would do anything

I would do anything

If you asked me to

If one day life tears you away from me

If you die and go far from me

Little matters to me if you love me

Because I will die too

We would have eternity for ourselves

In the blue of all the immensity

In heaven, no more problems

My love, do you believe that we love each other?

God reunites those who love each other

Outwear Makes A Different

Once my friend was told how stylish am I. Well, I'm pleased to hear that but I don't think so. Stylish it's not a real praise anyway. I love to being stylish, but I was. Somehow a several months full of charge has change my perspective about this.

And I realize that it's not about fashion. It's about style, hey! Fashion is a trend lately, which is sometimes could be so boring. I mean, you walk up in the street and there's three, four, or maybe more people with same style with you. Or even worse, same clothes. That's awful bad.

I have a bored piece of pink dress that I never used before. Before it become a waste I try to mix it with vintage blue-jeans vest or blue-jeans shirt. and my lovely-dove Indian clutch bag. Mwah! I love it.

P.s. I'm addicted with jeans lately

Paris van Java

Attention please (it feels like I'm screaming out in an awkward silence)!!

I have a little announcement here.

As my Dad went to Bandung today, he said that I'm accepted as a student in National Hotel Institute Bandung.

Yeah!

Management and Business of Convention where I'll learn how to be a good event organizer.

Thanks God!!

Favorite Daily Outfit

Even that's me who sat in the toilet, I felt scary, too, when I saw this picture. It's taken by darling Jean, while we was waiting for the movie last Tuesday.

Yup! That's my favorite outfit for daily use. It's blue jeans, my Mom's white broderie shirt, a crop blue plaid shirt as jacket, an ethnic necklace (my brother gave me as birthday present), blue flat shoes and my favorite vintage knitting-cross bag I stole it from my grandma hohoho)

I get my money back

Love is a game for two. So whenever I think about my love story, I really wish I could say 'us' or 'we' whenever I miss those memories. It's pretty odd and pretty creepy even for myself cause it sounds crazy that you love someone who don't love you for years. Thank God it's over. Couple week ago I realize that he doesn't mean anything for me anymore and I knew that he's not the one (though I wish that he was). Time's up and I decide to let it go.

That freak little boy had changed my life. That's how it started, with one sight of his existence he change my way of thinking, my perspective of love and life.

But when I let it go, I feel nothing. I don't waste any tears, somehow I felt so relief that I finally can move on and erase something I thought I can never able to forget. I saw him with my own eyes last week, after a long, crazy and weary year with so many question in my head, "Could I make it? Is there any hope lefts for me? How much the possibility I have?". It's crazy to be numb after those hectic years where there's a time when i miss him badly, when I cry to my sleep as a fool and blah blah blah. Guess you don't wanna hear it, so named it instead.

I saw him for about a hour and half, and all I think about is some sentences. "I get my money back", and "nothing to lose". I just wonder if love is a show, God is the host. He's the star and I'm the audience. Those who enjoyed the show wouldn't mind to pay the ticket, but those who don't like it could back to the ticket box and get some return.

I get my money back. And I get my strength back, too. Holding on maybe the best way when you can't let someone go but trust me, let it go feels so good. And empty, sure. But someone will come. Someone who'll love me, too.

I didn't get what I want but at least I still have what I had before. What a relief.

P.s.

Why its so hard to find songs about saying 'I'm over you', 'I'll forget you', 'I'll let you go' or something positive for people who'd just let someone go away for their own sake? Gee.

Summer Shoes

In the early of holiday I bought this shoes in sale. Guess what? It's only IDR 75.000 or about US$7 and 5cents. Pretty cheap right? And I love this shoes much. So simple, gorgeous and it's flats! Every girl should have one flats, I think.

Chicken Boneless Fussili Without Oil.

Sometimes there's a time when I really do enjoy to cook. My meal, or maybe for my brother or whoever wants to eat. Sometimes I just go downstair and playing in the kitchen just because I want to cook something, with or without apetite (2 out of 8 actually).

I made this food, Chicken Boneless Fussili Without Oil. Sound weird, huh? It is. It feels like a five star hotel's chef when I made this. When I ate this, it tastes very delicious. Remember, hungry is the best spice for every chef no matter how fool they are in cooking.

It's pretty easy to make this. You just need:

1. A fussili, of course.

2. Boneless chicken, chop it. Square is good (at least it would be better than mine)

3. Fresh tomato, chop chop.

4. Seasoning: pepper, salt, onion, cooking oil and sesame oil.

So after you make your fussili al dente, you have to make the sauce. But I don't. That's not even a sauce. I don't know how will it taste in your mouth but I made my own recipe (it sounds like I'm the expert ha ha). Stir-fry the onion with cooking oil. Add the chicken with tomato, pepper and salt, don't forget the sesame oil. Trust me, it doesn't taste like Chinese-food.

It's ready. Served with fussili.

Eat that.

Not so good? Sure it is!

I always said hungry is the best spice.

Farewell

left to right: me & Niya.

I remember that we planned to go to wholesaler with Rezky (yep, the photo taken by her). The funny thing is we arrived at that place earlier than the seller. We came when that place haven't open yet. So this is it, a cool pic in escalator.

left to right, Rezky and me.

Fallen for ice cream after school time in hot summer day

(it's Jakarta anyway, everyday is summer).

My senior high-school's time is up. And now I'm going to college (actually I'm still waiting to the answer after my hectic 4-days-test in Bandung). Today one of my besties named Niya are leaving J-town to Malang (I'm not sure.. it's some place in province East of Java. or maybe Central of Java. Don't ask me, I'm not map-expert) as she decides to school in Brawijaya University. It takes 16 hours from Jakarta to there by bus, she said, and I feel blue today cause I have no chance to meet her for the last time (though I know we'll meet again, maybe in Christmas). I was spent this day with hanging out with my other besties: Glory, Jean, and Rezky. They feel sad, too, about Niya's leaving.

Maybe the one who feel sad the most is me. I had 6 years friendship with Glory, 3 years with Niya and 2 years with Jean & Rezky but years doesn't matter. Friends is friends and I've learned from my fail-friendship (somehow it sound like I have a failed marriage ^^;) that it's not year that count but moments. Memory, how many things we shared together, those countless times we laughs or cry together (well, we're not that kind of girl who crying a lot for our problem. we feel bad and blue, then we think how to solve it without crying).

I have an ex-friend of mine. Yeah that's sounds ironic. I feel sorry for that, but that's the truth. I don't care if she blame me for that cause I know that she was wrong, too. I didn't ask too much, I believe. I don't think the friendship it's end just because I don't spent the lunch-time with her. I was actually believe thatwe got a friendship that even stronger than rocks. But maybe i was wrong. I just can't stand people who give up everthing (almost) just for money. "Oh, I don't wanna do that cause it's expensive. I'd rather take this cause it's a penny cheaper." Something like that, or even worse.

Alright, back to the topics. What date it is? July 20, 2010. Niya's leaving for Malang and Friday July 24, Rezky will leave for Medan. It's the capital city of province North Sumatra. It's University of North Sumatra. That's in the other island, geez! Glory will left for President University but thank God it's in Karawang (some kind of place between Jakarta and Bandung) but still she's got to stay in dorm. Jean in Binus University, in west of Jakarta so she'll stay in Jakarta, in her house.

I never thought that it's real for real when I used to enjoy my day in senior high school. All I think about college is my plan to leave Jakarta to Singapore (yes, that's totally FAILED) or Bandung, probably (which is being my last hope today) and I'm pretty sure that apart is alright cause we promised to contact each other and hanging out again in holdiay.

But now, I face it. The time is coming.

I was asked to myself, "What would my life be without my besties?" They all are so kind to me. I got suprises in every birthday since I met them. And that's give me more reasons to love them. They are so precious to me and I'm so scared that I will lose them cause we far apart and we got a new friends in college.

Most of all, I'm afraid we'll change by the time we met again.

I remember that once Rezky told me about the graduation lyric by Vitamin C when we had a lunch after a tiring vintage-hunt with Niya and Karina.

So if we get the big jobs

And we make the big money

When we look back now

Will our jokes still be funny?

Will we still remember everything we learned in school?

Still be trying to break every single rule?

Ever since then I always think about those words. Will it?

This is the topics that I've been thinking about like nuts for days, maybe weeks (I didn't realize until today). And it's so important to me, I guess, cause I don't care about person that I loved so much for a decade and the fact that man who school abroad is here until September (yes, that's why I was so confused about September) and we'd just met a couple days ago. I don't even care if I lost him forvere (maybe that's because I know that my love for him just completely washed out, maybe I wait too long or anything. I dont even want to talk about it right now).

I made this words today, in my way home after watched movies in cinema with them (anyway, I watced Inception starring Leonardi Di Caprio and it's awesome even it's little bit confused in the begining and at the end of movie. You've gotta be smart to watch it, I think):

FAREWELL

probably it means: we FAR apart but in the End WE'LL meet again. someday we will.

and I think about Tom Petty's words:

You and I will meet again

When we're least expecting it

One day in some far off place

I will recognize your face

I won't say goodbye my friend,

For you and I will meet again

I want to believe it.

left to right, Jean and me.

Guess what? We're taking this picture in toll road!

We was going to Binus cause I enrolled in there by bus and the driver is mad.

That's the first time we pass the toll gate by walking.

left to right, Glory and me.

Going crazy during the lunch-time infront of our class. I

t's a priceless pic for her, I guess, for she always looks cool and you would never know her crazy side if you don't really know her well.

um..

well.
I wish I could write something.
but I have no idea so sorry, I'll write some jargon.
Like,
"Books I'm reading now is Matilda by Roald Dahl and Eat Love Pray by Elizabeth Gillbert.
I watch Pucca in youtube, I was just creat a new account in there but I have no idea what I'm going to post because I'm not kind of video-girl. I just made it to write comment, that's all."

it's a jargon.
sorry.

featuring Luella

it's summertime!

but however ince I live in Jakarta where the max daily weather is 37-degree of celcius, everyday is hot summer here. even in rainy season, the weather is about 32 or 33 degree. pretty crazzy, huh?

I took this pic about an hour ago. I'm so bored in this holiday (after I graduate from SHS there's a long holiday from May until August. Guess it's the longest holday I ever got).

it's Luella. I named it after my favourite designer name, Luella Bartley. actually she's not a doll. she's a bag that I found one day in some cute shop near of my house. I accidently found her and I look how cute it is so I decided to buy it.

and it's some summer style that I'd just made today. ethnic long-shirt with floral shorts, Luella and my brother sneakers (mine was awfully bad cause I own it since 16 and wore it everyday in SHS days. it's actually light pink but I don't know how to explain the right color now).

I actually not going to anywhere today but I wonder that this outfit would be good to take a walk in afternoon. maybe I'll go to convinience store and grab some ice cream. or maybe not.