He used to say he loves me more than I could ever imagine, his love is beyond my expectation, beyond my actual feelings for him.
And I don't believe it. So life goes on and last week he went to my campus to pick me. We went for movies, date things like usual. But one thing unusual is his silence. And I really hate it. I know he left his assignments for this date, but I hate how he talks nothing and use that damn assignment as the reason. I tried to understand his point of view, but that's been month he act like this. I think that's alright but turns out it's not. I miss the chatty him, how he talks so much when we met.
He takes me home, and I off to bed, need a peace with myself. I called him when I woke up and tell him what's on my mind. How tired I was and how I was so close for asking a break of our relationship. The conversation ended well. I, as always, cry. And he, as always, calm me down and beg for the tears to stop.
When the mood gets better, he asked if I want a break. That was a huge surprise, why did he asked me back? His answer was totally blew my mind. It's huge, far beyond my abilities to understand how much I meant for him.
He said, "Well, I don't wanna lose you. I want you for my life.And if take a break for a while gonna makes you feel better and save our relationship for future, than I guess I have no choice. I want you till the end. And I've been open up about us to my family, right? My mom, my dad, my old sister, every one. I just want the best for us."
And that's how I knew it's true. He never lie since, well, you know. His words is true, his feeling is pure. No promises, just a straight action.
I'm sorry, dear. To doubt you, to think you didn't care. To everything. And thank you for always forgive me and take me as I am.
You know I love you too xoxo
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